Sir Philip Sidney
| What the Big House Owes to us. | What we Owe to the Big House. | ||
| 1. | As much of our company as it likes to command. | 1. | Heartburnings from envy. |
| 2. | As much dance music as it can get out of our fingers. | 2. | Headaches from dissipation. |
| 3. | The complete transfer of all the bores among its guests from its shoulders to ours. | 3. | The chronic discontent of our three maids. |
| 4. | The entire management of its Workhouse teas. | 4. | The utter demoralisation of our boot-boy. |
| 5. | The wear and tear of mind of all its Christmas-trees and bran-pies. | 5. | The acquaintance of several damaged fine ladies. |
| 6. | The physicking of its sick dogs. | 6. | A roll of red flannel from the last wedding. |
| 7. | The setting its canaries' broken legs. | 7. | The occasional use of a garden-hose. |
| 8. | The general cheerful and grateful charing for it. |
'There! I do not think that the joys an